In my 30 years doing negotiations at all levels, I realise that these three rules are really what matter for achieving great results in any type of negotiations. The wonderful thing about these three golden rules is that even unskilled negotiators can win big time using these rules. They are the ABC of negotiation.
1) Aim Big 2) Be Patient 3) Concede Small
1) Aim Big
This is the realm of Aspiration, Arnold Toynbee once said: “It is a paradoxical but profoundly true and important principle of life that the most likely way to reach a goal is to be aiming not at that goal itself but at some more ambitious goal beyond it.”2) Be PatientI visited an Antique shop with my wife the other day and we fancied a great looking Victorian coffee table that was in mint condition.
The price tag was £499 and my wife was dying to buy it, the sales man noticed her attachment to the table and naturally wouldn’t budge on the pri
I said to him very politely that I am very embarrassed by the situation and that all what I have in my pocket is £90 pounds and no credit card
the sales man was shocked but appreciated my “openness” with him and said “you couldn’t make it £200 pounds.. (notice the concession he made.. for next golden rule).I took my wife aside to ask if she has any money on her while she knew what I was doing..
I went back to the sales man and said my wife has only £20 on her and offered him all what we have which is £110 in total…..to my surprise he accepted while my wife was pleasantly in shock.
Obviously I can give you hundreds of examples on this golden rule, but I hope you got the point.
Poor negotiators are shy to ask or to aspire for stunning results. Remember you can always ask and the worst that could happen is that you get a NO, but more often than not the other party will want to continue if he saw that you are “genuine” and “polite”.
Try this rule when you buy a new car. First decide which car, study the price, determine how much you will pay (planning) and then, take the money in cash with you on the last day of the month and show it to the sales man “humbly” explaining that this is all you have for this beautiful car.
Just make sure that what you are paying him is around 20% less than the asking price. I promise you, you will get the car you dreamt off all this time and at a great price.
Have you heard of the expression "the 11Th hour?" And "All good things come to those who wait".3) Concede smallIn most negotiations big concessions happen in the last few hours regardless of how long the negotiation has taken.
The more you bring the sales man or the buyer to his deadline without you conceding too much (The next golden rule) the more concessions will be given at the end.
Being patient till the end is what differentiates "the boys from the men and the girls from the women."
Top negotiators with no exceptions are patient, they play on the changing circumstances that will favour them in the end. This is one of Nature’s most sacred laws... things will change.
A Chinese proverb may be helpful here “if you wait patiently by the side of the river, the corpse of your enemy will pass you by”.
You need to negotiate with the Russians one day to understand this golden rule.There you go, the ABC of negotiation: Aim Big, Be Patient, Concede small and good luckThe concession pattern tells a “patient” negotiator so much about his opponent's situation and negotiation style.
The salesman in the antique shop went from £499 to £200, he reduced the price by 60% in the first go.. Is there more concessions to come? You may ask... of course there is.
What about the sales man situation? You could safely assume that the article in question couldn’t have cost him more than third of what he is asking for and that my £90 offer was still making him little profit or he wouldn’t have continued the negotiation.
A reasonable return for him would in this case be 50% and hence my £110 offer was what he would be comfortable with albeit not a great deal for him.
If the sales man said from the outset that he couldn’t go less than £400 which is a reduction of 20% as the first concession... how much you think I could have settled this for?
The answer would be around £190. Why? Going by the “third cost rule” for his industry, the table would have cost him about £130, adding 50% makes around £190 pounds.
Do you get the point?
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Osama El-Kadi is an international negotiation and strategy Expert and motivational speaker
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